Warning: Rant with some unsafe for the kids language.
I got a call from Car Guy today. We are unhappy campers. I was scheduled to head out to his place in California on Saturday to help him replace his roof. The shake shingles are old, worn and leaky and it needs to be replaced. It's a job he and I have done many times before. We're not exactly licensed professionals but we're pretty damn talented DIYers. We're friends of many decades. Really he's my brother by choice as opposed to by blood. That doesn't even really matter. He could be a neighbor, casual friend or even just sum dood and if asked I'd still help him with the task. It's what we do for each other as members of a civilized society.
But no. It is not to be. Why? Because the ever so caring and concerned (Democrat controlled) state of California has decreed that if one replaces their own roof on their very own house they cannot be helped by anyone who isn't a blood relative who lives under that same roof. I'll give you a minute to re-read that last sentence and absorb the wonderfulness that is liberal politics. Done? Cool but wait, there's more.
When Car Guy went and got his permit, that he paid the very same fee as roofing companies do but that's for another post, he was informed that the city would forward his application information to the state and that said state inspectors were actively checking roofing sites to ensure compliance with their draconian rules and regulations and had in fact already issued 'several' citations. The fine? I am so glad you asked. $100,000.00.
One Hundred Thousand Dollars. Contemplate that for a moment my friends. ONE. HUNDRED. THOUSAND. DOLLARS. Minimum. Which means it most certainly will be more if the state can see any way to squeeze you for more. For having a friend help you roof your house. But hey, that sounds totally fair. I mean, it's roofing being done by the unlicensed! How horrid!
I'm not talking about inspections to make sure the work is done to code. No no no. I have no real issues with that. I'm talking about doing to code work with the help of a relative or friend who isn't authorized by the state to do the work. It's not rocket science or brain surgery or even food preparation. It's roofing. It's not that fucking complex or dangerous. It's ROOFING!
But just hold on there a second there Mister Six, you say, how exactly is that hate on women and the poor? Aren't you really nothing more than a shill for the Republicans who and a closet Islamohomogynophobe? You're nothing but another rich banker fat cat one percenter hating on the state for ensuring that no one who isn't a licensed roofing professional is allowed to expose their tender hides to the unmerciful elements and risk their very lives doing something only the select few should be allowed to do. Sit down and STFU Mister Six lest you die.
Well, let's do a little scenario role playing shall we?
Let's say I'm a husband and father of 2.5 bright and wonderful young children. I make a decent living and my wife works part time. We get by and even manage to put away a few bucks every month. We scrimped and saved and managed to put down enough for a down payment on a fixer upper house. It needs work but it's in our price range and it's close enough to schools and shopping that we can even walk. I have basic construction skills so am planning on doing the necessary work on the house to make it the home we've always dreamed of. I'm a nice guy so I also have many friends as well as family, all of whom are happy to pitch in where and when needed. Comes a strong storm and we lose some shingles. Suddenly the roof leaks. Badly. The damage is severe enough that a new roof is required. Ok, life happens and I'm not totally unprepared. I have just enough in savings to cover materials cost and I can totally do the work myself. Except that I was in an accident a few years ago and my back/legs/arms don't work as well as I'd like. No problem. I have lots of friends and family who can do the heavy lifting. All is well. What's that you say Mister City/County/State public employee? If I get anyone to help it'll cost me my house and me, my wife and my lovely elementary school age children will lose everything we've worked our entire lives for? Instead I should hire a licensed roofing professional for 8 to 15 thousand dollars which I absolutely do not have because I'm totally unqualified to do the work on my own house myself? I can't make my own decisions? Yeah, that sounds totally fair.
Or how about this. I'm a single woman, living alone because that's just how I like things. I love my little house but it needs a new roof . On my modest salary I can't afford a licensed roofer. I do have some very close friends who are totally into things like that though so for a fraction of the cost of hiring licensed professionals I can get a new roof. Isn't this a great country? No? I can't do that because it'd ruin me financially? Oh, I understand completely. Hand me that pan would you? I need to catch this leak.
Or. I have a house that's slightly under water (thank you House and Senate Democrats). I'm renting it out and can just make ends meet because I signed on the bottom line and am the sort of person who takes their obligations seriously. Rather than abandoning the house and adding another foreclosure to the unending list I'm trying to be part of the housing crisis solution. But. The house needs a new roof and as the landlord I'm obligated by California Rental Law to make the necessary repairs or face slumlord sanctions. But I no longer live there. I fact I live in another state where it's cheaper just so I can meet my financial obligations. I load up my tools and fill my truck with 4 dollar a gallon gas and head out because I can afford the materials and can do the work myself but I can't afford to hire licensed professionals. No? One hundred thousand dollar fine you say? Here ya go Mister Mortgage Holder. Here's the keys. Have fun finding a buyer. Sorry about that Renter Family. I know the rent was reasonable and there's nothing available at a cost you can afford. Hope your parents have room in their basement.
That last one? Yeah, that's me. Lu and I actually subsidize the rent to the tune of 800 bucks a month rather than just throw in the towel and default. Think we're going to hire out thousands of dollars in repairs or upgrades? Not in this economy Governor Brown. I'll kick out the renters and abandon the fucking thing before I so much as spend a dime on licensed professionals to do work I can do myself.
Or or or or. I could go on and on and so could anyone with an ounce of compassion or common sense. But both of those things seem to be missing fro the State of California. They'd rather see the proles go without than permit the common folks to work on their own property. They're not licensed you see. They don't know what they're doing. Doesn't matter that they have access to someone who does, he's also not licensed. Doesn't count. If you can't do it, all by yourself with no help but those who actually live with you and share a common ancestor it's just not going to be tolerated.
It's the nanny state gone wild. It's those who claim the high road selling out to special interests and the lure of a fast, budget propping buck. Taken from the picked over carcass of already over burdened tax payers. It's a prime example of why businesses and productive citizens are fleeing the state in droves. It's about money and control and it's fucking outrageous.
The worst part is this is hardly a single instance. It's everywhere from Pate de Foie Gras to guns to child care to health care to anything and everything you'd care to name. It's politicians pretending to champion the little guy sticking their finger in that same little guy's eye, plucking out that soft orb and then skull fucking him to death. And don't give me any shit about it's both parties. Not in reliably blue California. Other places yeah but not in the People's Socialist Democratic Republic. It's Democrat run from top to bottom and it's rocketing to financial ruin on the dead bodies of those who have tried for years to prop up the monster through hard work and gobs of wasted taxes. They tried to outlaw circumcisions for Grapp's sake until they passed a bill to outlaw outlawing circumcisions. Really? This is what you in the state house are worried about and arguing over? Circumcision? Calling it a freak show is insulting to fat bearded ladies the world over.
Lu and I have always planned on moving back someday. As soon as I get the Utah house to the point where it would make financial sense to sell it. Now? I'm split. On the one hand Car Guy lives just a few blocks from my house and I'd dearly love to see him every day. The other hand is shit like this that no sane person could endure if they could avoid it. The gripping hand is I see no end to the abusive foolishness of that state.
So. That's where we are on this fine Tuesday morning. I'm still going out to see Car Guy and his lovely bride because I love them and I want to spend some time with them. I will sit on my fat ass on the sidewalk and shout singularly unhelpful tips to Car Guy whilst he toils away on a job I should be helping him with. A job he's still going to come out here and help me do because I don't live in a Liberal Paradise and can actually take care of my own property in the way that seems best to me, the property owner. I will not stiff arm salute the state inspector when he comes with his demands of "Papers Please". I'll even keep my mouth shut and not talk to him with a bad fake German accent while goose stepping around the property because he'd only take it out on Car Guy like all the good little Liberal Nazis do and Car Guy doesn't need any more aggravation. And I will cry at what's been done to a state I once loved and a Country I still do because this is just a taste of what's to come.
It's Blue State Tyranny. Coming soon to a state near you?