The Garden

I hate rubbing anyone's nose in something none of us can affect but here in Utah's Dixie Spring has sprung. It was time to see to the garden.

Some of you may remember that last year I built a raised planting bed out of bricks I removed from the Kid's Room remodel for Lu. She tried some late season plantings. She got shoots and some growth but the cold hit us early and everything died or went into hibernation. With the warm weather returning some of her carrots and lettuce seems to have survived. We fertilized the bed and Lu thinks she'll yet get some edibles. I was concerned that the brick bed wouldn't hold but it did, through some pretty bad storms, enormous rains and even quite a bit of freezing temps and snow. Makes me kinda proud.

I decided we needed to improve the garden and expand it a bit this year. Mostly because we have a Black Lab who relishes digging in that dirt next to the wooden fence back there. So a new fence was indicated. I had some old wrought iron fencing laying around so.... The gate is a double swinger just to the left of the raised bed.

This year we're adding some plants. Here's Lu planting the strawberries. Just behind her is the potato area. Red Somethingorothers and Yukon Gold. You can just see some of our peach tree buds on the left. Purty.

I cleaned out all that area and we spread in some cow manure. I still shake my head at that. Someone collects and sells cow poop to people like me. That small tree there is our peach tree. We planted it last Fall. It's budded out and our nursery Gal says we may get fruit this year. Hooray!!

I climbed up on the kids play house for some aerial pictures.

It's not a huge garden but with some careful planning we should do well. Corn and melons (Water and Honeydew) in the large area on the left. Strawberries where Lu is working. Potatoes behind the planter. Carrots, lettuce, cucumbers and probably something I'm forgetting in the bed itself. Oh and tomatoes will be way over on the far left so we can intertwine the vines into the fencing. Add in a few peaches (maybe, I hope) and we're talking some fine vittles.

Of course, someone was feeling left out.

He was already feeling quite put upon for being locked away from his favorite diggy spot and then Daddy goes and climbs up out of reach.

You come down from there right now!!!

So I did. After teasing him. But just a little. I swear.

Strawberries, carrots, lettuce and potatoes are in now. The rest will be planted in April. I need to redo the watering system. I'm taking water out of the back building but the faucet is inside. I need to reroute things so a blowout doesn't soak the game room and gym. Ah, more plumbing. Lovely.

I have to admit this. I'm kinda getting into this gardening foe food thing. I shouldn't be all that surprised though. My grandfather and his forebears back for some time were farmers. Must be a blood thing. I just hope we don't end up with a garden full of dead things. Zombie Carrots I don't need.
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Grandkids - A Lttle Awesome and A Little Ewww

We went for a nice trail ride today. It was the first chance to try out the new suspension bikes we bought for the kids. The bikes were a hit and the kids got quickly back into the swing of mountain biking. Of course there was one more purchase we had to make.

When we got rid of the old bikes everything went with them. That meant new helmets were in order. We decided to wait and let the kids pick out their own so off to the big box store we went. Miss Princess went with Grandma while Captain Awesome and I perused the offerings. When each saw the helmets we eventually bought they were instantly grasped by excited hands and pronouncements of their awesomeness were both voluble and oft repeated. Which ones did they pick out you ask?

That's a cat on the left and a mohawk on the right. Cool Kitty and Mysterious Mohawk. They were in 7 and 9 year old heaven. Miss Princess refused to take hers off even in the restaurant where we went for an after ride breakfast. Which brings me to the Ewww part of the story.

I have now seen consumed what is perhaps the most vile and noxious meal ever imagined in the fevered dreams of even the most jaded and exploitative restauranteur. It was at IHOP so you may already have an unsettling idea of what we witnessed.

They both ordered the chocolate with chocolate chip pancakes. With whip cream of course. They then proceeded to absolutely cover them with every type of syrup available. Maple, butter pecan, blueberry and the horrible boysenberry. The plates were swimming in the stuff. It soaked into the pancakes and combined with the whip cream to produce a vile concoction that both kids ate with barely concealed glee, pronouncing it 'delicious'. I got a toothache just sitting at the same table. I couldn't even watch them eat. It was like two sugar sharks in a feeding frenzy with little bits of brown pancake flotsam and multicolored syrup jetsam. Even the gore channel would have begged off filming it.

It occurred to me that they may have stumbled upon the perfect interrogation technique for adults.

"Won't talk eh? Well how about we add some....BOYSENBERRY!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!

"No no. Anything but that. I'll talk! I'll talk!" (Sounds of uncontrolled sobbing and retching)

Then again, it might just be too cruel. I know I'll never look at the kids menu the same way again.

The horror. The horror.
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LauraB On Canning Emergency Food For Our Canine Friends

A while back Laura B. made a comment about canning emergency rations for our doggy buddies. I asked her to consider posting about it for those of us ignorant of the process (like yours truly). She has done so and bless her because it's priceless information. Go here, read it and then make a reference copy (I hope that's Ok Laura) for later use. It's chock full of informationy goodness with photos for those of us who are visual learners, including dos and don'ts (the tip on can openers being a great example). For anyone with beloved dogs (and there's no reason it won't work for cats or any other pets you might have) this is how you ensure that if things go from bad to worse you'll be able to keep them fed and healthy.

Love you Laura. Lu and I are in the process of following your advice and prepping for Angus. I can't thank you enough for posting on this. Helping each other in times of distress is what this community is all about. Well done!

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Food Storage

It's no secret that Lu and I live in a small town in southern Utah. It's where she was born and raised and where she's related to...well, pretty much everybody. We like it here. The crime rate is low, the area is beautiful and the people are friendly. They're also predominately Mormon which means food storage is simply an every day fact of life. The Mormons advise every family to have at least a one year supply of food. Lu and I, though no longer Mormon, have taken that to heart. In fact we have been working on our storage and pantry for years.

I'm going to give a shout out to Rourke at Modern Survival Online. You can find him on my blog roll and he's absolutely worth your time. Take a few minutes and peruse his posts and side bar. He has a lot of good information and links on preparedness including some downloads that are fantastic, especially his Survival Database Downloads. Rourke is my go to guy for all things prepper. I'm not getting a thing from Rourke for recommending his site just as I paid for everything in this post.

And isn't it great that the moniker prepper is no longer a slur? With the economy sliding into oblivion prepping is now seen for what it really is. Just good sense.

On to our food storage. Lu and I concentrated for many years on dry goods; beans, rice, pasta and canned veggies/meat. It's all in our rotation and we replace it as we use it so the pantry is always full. We have a flour grinder, water storage and alternate means of heat, power and cooking. What we were missing was a goodly supply of dehydrated and vacuum sealed very long term foods. A couple of weeks ago we finally addressed that.

That's 400 pounds of miscellaneous dehydrated/ vacuum sealed foods.

The manufacturer is Rainy Day Foods.We chose them because they're a source of quality foods, they're relatively inexpensive and we were able to buy them locally so I could inspect what I was buying in person before plunking down our money. There are a lot of good suppliers out there so shop around.

As I said, we bought locally. I got the chance to talk to the store owner and feel him out for his expertise and see his products. I liked what I saw so we went with him. The alternatives were a 3 hour drive or buying online. Either was acceptable but this was a lot easier. We spent $800 on this supply which, while seemingly pricey, is actually a very good deal. This is long term storage. Most of this food is good for 20 years or more if stored correctly. We have it in our cool and dry basement where the temperature never varies greatly. It's even cool in Summer. Think root cellar.

With that purchase Lu and I decided it was time to do a bit of clean up and reordering of the pantry. We had the sugar, salt, rice and beans, etc. stored in plastic bins. Ok but not really efficient. You can see them at the back left of the picture. The green tubs that are in the process of collapsing under their own weight. And a certain black dog who seems to be becoming a camera hog.

We decided to replace the bins with 5 gallon plastic buckets with sealing lids. 6 bucks each at WalMart.  Fill 'em up, pound the lid on with a rubber hammer and you're set. There's no way to vacuum seal them that I am aware of but this is part of our rotational storage so no worries. They're also very sturdy so mice won't be an issue.

And they stack so much better. 8 of the buckets have plain lids while the two that are in the rotation have screw on lids to ease access. Those are the ones with the X lids. When we exhaust one of the rotation buckets we re-fill it from another bucket and then buy replacement food. Oldest used first.The food is on shelves and is easy to access and keep track of.

Using the buckets for the heavy stuff allowed us to put some lighter foods, like Ramen, in the old bins. Yes Ramen is an excellent food storage item as long as you store it well and rotate it regularly.

Lu and I are far from expert in this area but we do have a plan, such as it is. We have a years supply of long term storage/emergency food and about 6 additional months in our rotational supply. Everything from grains and beans to vegetables and condiments. We can make flour and cook. There's even drink mixes and 60 pounds of dried/dehydrated milk in there. Rotation of perishables is vital. If the food doesn't spoil most of it is edible even well after it's 'best when used by' date but it's nutritional value decreases as it ages. Use it and replace it are the watch words. Do your homework and spend your money wisely. Don't rely on a single source of emergency food. That creates a single point of failure and could be disastrous should you ever find yourself in need.

And that's the whole point to all of this. It doesn't have to be TEOTWAWKI to find yourself short of food. Natural disasters, gasoline shortages/outrageous cost or even a job loss can all create a situation where a well packed larder could be the difference between life and death. You can create a nice back up just by buying a few cans of food every week and sticking it away. Just like firearms and self defense, food storage should be a large part of your 'Go To Hell' plan.

This is our food storage plan. Others do it differently. If you decide you want to do something similar I suggest doing a lot of homework and arm yourself with as much knowledge as possible. Most of the preppers I know are only too happy to share and don't forget one of the best organizations out there for food prep information. That's right, the Mormon Church. They're experts on this stuff and more than willing to share their knowledge.

Of course any food supply will only last as long as you store it correctly and have the ability to defend it. Fortunately the Big Dog is on the job. Good Boy Angus! And yes, we do have a plan to feed him in dire circumstances.

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Eating Rant

We are constantly bombarded with propaganda from all sides on what foods are good and what are bad. I'm hardly telling you anything new, it's been going on for decades. 

I remember when we were told that eggs were bad. Then they were good. Then Ok or maybe bad depending on how you chewed or something equally brilliant. I have no earthly idea what iteration we're on now. I'm old enough to remember a bit on Carson (oh so many years ago) where some expert diet group announced their evil and angelic food lists. Pasta was supposed to be a goodie back then. Later not so much. Again, I don't know where the current argument places carbohydrates but I'm betting you can find someone on both sides of the argument with little effort. I'm just too lazy to do any actual research.

The latest I am aware of involves caloric intake. The idea is that restricted diets lead to longer lives. It's science and it's settled with starving monkeys and everything so stop eating so much all you fat bastards! Except when it's not. Great Ghu am I tired of this exercise is Nanny Statism on the part of people who seemingly cannot definitively  answer any food questions except that eating anything that actually tastes good is verbotten. Everything would be fine if only all of you people would just shut up and do what you're told. And forget what we said last week. We have always been at war with Eastasia and X has always been good/bad for you.

I get my diet information primarily from my daughter, The DO, who does do her research. I'm not saying I always (or even usually) take it but I do listen and heed because I know her and trust her. I know she always has my best interests at heart. And that's the difference here. We've seen it in the AGW debate. Scientists have an agenda and it usually doesn't involve your welfare. Food researchers want to make a living just as the climate scientists do. They're very interested in their next paycheck and a broad invocation of the old 'The Food Pyramid is a good rule of thumb and let's just let it go at that' won't get the bureaucrats and stake holders on their feet, throwing great wads of money at you. None of these folks actually has your personal welfare as their number one priority. There's generally a sliding scale of indebtedness and yours truly will invariably be found somewhere near the bottom. I'm not saying don't read and listen but consider the source and ask yourself what their true motivations might be.

Now I'm not one of those guys who complains without offering an opinion. Most emphatically not an educated opinion but still, how much worse could I do? Think 53 years of anecdotal evidence from a man in his late middle age and still going reasonably strong and take it for what it's worth.

We try and eat as fresh as possible. We have canned and boxed and folded/spindled/mutilated items and eat it whenever but I honestly think fresh is better for you. Then again pesticides, so there.
I read an old power-lifter's saw years ago about "it takes beef to build beef" and I followed it when I was lifting heavy. I still think it holds water. I eat a lot of beef. I mean a lot.
I try and limit my sugar intake, mostly because I'm fighting incipient old guy pot belly. Though I do like me some Mountain Dew. The real stuff, not that diet crapola.
I don't eat too late in the evening and I believe in the idea that if you clean your plate only so as to not waste food that food will go to your waist (aren't I clever? I totally stole that from someone but since I also suffer from CRS Syndrome I can't remember who. Let's just pretend it was me Ok?)

That's about it. Other than those things I eat exactly what I want, when I want and in the quantities I want. I ask no permissions nor do I offer any excuses. Beef, chicken, sourdough bread, milk, cold cereal, potatoes, eggs, bacon, pizza and pasta are my basic food groups. Frankly, my eating habits would probably send most nutritionists into instant anal apoplexy. I have no idea what that means I just really liked typing it. Anal Apoplexy. Insert 9 year old boy giggling here. Lu and I fry and scorch and bake and boil and cook with fire. We eat what sounds good at the time and don't really give it a lot of thought. Denial? Maybe, but man is it ever a tasty trip down the river. I may indeed have to pay for my eating habits one day but this is not that day.

And for the food Nazi's out there giving their expertise to a nation that really doesn't seem to want it I have this message. Please leave the opinions out of your findings and just give us the basic facts. If you know something by all means do share. I promise to listen to good science. If you're just guessing or inferring or angling for another fat grant from the government please shut up. You have been exactly 180 degrees wrong so many times now that I have zero confidence that any of you 'experts' are in the game for anything more than a paycheck and self aggrandizement. I know, I know. That sciency stuff is so hard! In the meantime I and others like me will continue to ignore your ignorant and contradictory mouth farts and get our information from sources we trust. Like my daughter.

And we'll probably continue to eat exactly what we want, when we want and in the quantities we want. And if Brigid is cooking I can pretty much guarantee I'll eat myself into a happy food coma with absolutely nary a guilt in sight.

Because I can, that's why.

Now if you'll excuse me I smell something tasty frying.

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The Hurricane JB's Big Boy And Raw Chicken. An Adventure in Dining and Salmonella.

Dear JB's, Hurricane Utah branch, Manager.

I went to your fine dining establishment this afternoon for a nice lunch with my lovely wife. She had the salad bar and I had the Chicken Fried Chicken sandwich because I'm a guy and I'll eat most anything chicken fried. I say most anything because I did in fact discover something today that is both chicken fried and completely inedible. And that something is your Chicken Fried Chicken sandwich with the raw chicken center.

The problems here are manifold. First, the outer fried texture combined with the cooked outer section led me to believe the meat was in fact properly cooked. So much so that I took a nice, healthy bite right out of the center of the sandwich without a care in the world. I thought the bite tasted a bit 'off' though so, as I was swallowing that large bite, I examined things a bit more carefully. Imagine my surprise to find that the center of the chicken breast was uncooked. Raw in fact. Not raw in the sense that it was hot but not quite cooked thoroughly. No no no. I'm talking about just above cold from the refrigerator raw. Salmonella raw.

Second. When that happens, and in any restaurant something like this is always a possibility, don't then send out the waitress to apologize for the error on behalf of the pimple faced, minimum wage cook who was sooo sure it was really really done and everything and then ask me if I want another one just like it or would I prefer to see the menu again. Come yourself, apologize abjectly for your failure and beg my forgiveness. I've just eaten raw chicken from your kitchen, half measures at this point will probably be frowned upon.

Third. When I have so declined and indicated that I have inexplicably lost my appetite don't then send her back out to tell me that if I get sick to call and ask for you by name because you really do care. And for @#$%ing sure do not present me with a bill. Oh I know she deducted the raw chicken sandwich from the bill but there's a thing in your business one usually employs in these circumstances. Pay attention here. It's called 'Comping.' Comping is when you and your staff have screwed up royally and you need to try and make things right and maybe not have an angry customer leave with an upset stomach and a strong desire to warn others away from your eating establishment and maybe sue you into penury. It is the polite and more importantly the right thing to do. For the $7.82 that we left for my wife's salad bar you have lost anything I may have spent with you over the years plus the money from others I will relate this little story to.

Fourth. People die from eating raw chicken. If you would like to prevent this from happening and perhaps keep you and your restaurant from being sued you might want to give your cooks a little training in the whole chicken cooking thing. I'm a fair cook myself (and in fact worked as a cook for JB's for a few years back in high school) so if you're strapped for assistance in that endeavor just ask me. At this point I'd be happy to school your staff to ensure no one else bites down on another chicken and bacteria sandwich. That's also something you might care to relate to me, the afflicted customer as well. The whole "I'll make sure nothing like this ever happens again. I swear!" thing.

I never forget and seldom forgive. And remember, you're famous now and the internet is indeed forever.

And now I must go. I'm feeling a bit queasy and the porcelain throne is calling out for the contents of my stomach. But hey, at least you made a cool eight bucks today. I hope that is a comfort to you as I puke my guts out from the results of your incompetence.

On the other hand, knowing I have my ambulance chasing lawyer on speed dial will be for me. Something to think on?

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